There is a part of me that begins to wonder as I reinvent myself, what do I really love? What gets me excited? Turned on?
It's been so long, in sexual terms, that I'm not really sure anymore. I know what porn I like looking at on the internet, but is that what I really like in real life? To answer that question is going to require some real research. There comes a point where dirty, nasty behavior is really just dirty and nasty, not really a turn on.
And what I love to do? I have no idea. I know I love to sail. And woodworking. But so much of what was my persona before doesn't feel like me now. I don't watch movies all that much, nor play video games... Many of the behaviors I had before are things that helped me escape from the reality that was my life. I have escaped now, so those things don't hold as much pleasure for me now. So what do I really want to spend my time doing?
